Resdiual Thoughts on Good Will Hunting
May. 6th, 2023 06:16 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
palusbuteoAlthough the movie and these thoughts are more about Robin Williams
One of the moments that really stuck out at me while watching GWH last night, conscious that the movie takes place and was produced in 1997, was that it (also) exists Before The Dark Times of our post 9/11 hellscape. As Will is going through his defensive-rant about some loser guy ending up in the army to go invade and fight in a pointless war where he inadvertently kills other people while the invaded is trying to defend and kills in return, etc etc
While he's referencing both Vietnam and likely Gulf War '01, the Sequence of Events he lays out in his rant hits shockingly familiar to what happened after 2001. It also triggered that deep emotional hatred of Humanity and how we keep repeating the same mistakes over and over again, that learning History makes you miserable because you realize we can't help ourselves to constantly fuck up or want to bring hell to everyone and everything.
So, that triggered a LOT of introspection for me.
And then there's Robin Williams
alluded to a little in the initial post (which was edited heavily for FB) was now that (we) know how much pain and mental anguish he was in this whole time, it's also hit me hard in the feels and the thinky-thoughts.
There was a time where I found him obnoxious and annoying and not really that funny. Or too intense, needed to tone it down a little bit, slow the pace of the heavy-hitters a bit. etc. Particularly the time after Aladdin came out and he was only seen as The Genie and had to essentially "be" the Genie character. I also realize this was the time period of the Teenage and Post-College Angst periods of my life.
Now, I realize it was a moment where he was in panic-mode and throwing in all of the things to get a positive response because of the trauma and suffering, he was not going to allow anyone else in his presence be miserable, going out of his way to "defend" others while using himself and his emotional state as the barrier, etc.....When he probably didn't need to.
But, he was on camera or on the spot so he had to Perform
And now I'm trying hard to not analyze and think about the roles he's played emotionally-charged characters and realizing what we were seeing was all of the suffering he was going through, on screen.
and it's rough. For me now to have more self-insight and of course my own trauma and damage and ADHD and "I can SEE it now"
It also feels like the movie GWH is less about Will Hunting and more about McGuire / Williams
Also also: TOOL's "Jambi" from 10,000 Days has been playing in my head the last 2 days. So that doesn't help in the emotionally-charged state, as it's a song looking at "unfulfilled wishes & desires"
---
Hopefully I can switch gears today and not want to go find a dark corner alone and crumple into a pile.
One of the moments that really stuck out at me while watching GWH last night, conscious that the movie takes place and was produced in 1997, was that it (also) exists Before The Dark Times of our post 9/11 hellscape. As Will is going through his defensive-rant about some loser guy ending up in the army to go invade and fight in a pointless war where he inadvertently kills other people while the invaded is trying to defend and kills in return, etc etc
While he's referencing both Vietnam and likely Gulf War '01, the Sequence of Events he lays out in his rant hits shockingly familiar to what happened after 2001. It also triggered that deep emotional hatred of Humanity and how we keep repeating the same mistakes over and over again, that learning History makes you miserable because you realize we can't help ourselves to constantly fuck up or want to bring hell to everyone and everything.
So, that triggered a LOT of introspection for me.
And then there's Robin Williams
alluded to a little in the initial post (which was edited heavily for FB) was now that (we) know how much pain and mental anguish he was in this whole time, it's also hit me hard in the feels and the thinky-thoughts.
There was a time where I found him obnoxious and annoying and not really that funny. Or too intense, needed to tone it down a little bit, slow the pace of the heavy-hitters a bit. etc. Particularly the time after Aladdin came out and he was only seen as The Genie and had to essentially "be" the Genie character. I also realize this was the time period of the Teenage and Post-College Angst periods of my life.
Now, I realize it was a moment where he was in panic-mode and throwing in all of the things to get a positive response because of the trauma and suffering, he was not going to allow anyone else in his presence be miserable, going out of his way to "defend" others while using himself and his emotional state as the barrier, etc.....When he probably didn't need to.
But, he was on camera or on the spot so he had to Perform
And now I'm trying hard to not analyze and think about the roles he's played emotionally-charged characters and realizing what we were seeing was all of the suffering he was going through, on screen.
and it's rough. For me now to have more self-insight and of course my own trauma and damage and ADHD and "I can SEE it now"
It also feels like the movie GWH is less about Will Hunting and more about McGuire / Williams
Also also: TOOL's "Jambi" from 10,000 Days has been playing in my head the last 2 days. So that doesn't help in the emotionally-charged state, as it's a song looking at "unfulfilled wishes & desires"
---
Hopefully I can switch gears today and not want to go find a dark corner alone and crumple into a pile.
